Men tell us about their body insecurities
One of the toughest aspects of having body insecurities or challenges as a man is that you are not meant to talk about them. It is considered weak by society to do so. The majority of the guys remain silent about it. In my last post, I asked whether guys had insecurities or not. I realized that it was mostly women who were more insecure about how they looked than men.
In today’s piece, I invited my male friends, to tell us about their body insecurities. I am delighted they agreed because, like me, we all have the perception that insecurities affect women only. It’s undeniable that guys, too, have insecurities. I believe we can now find a balance to halt body-shaming between the sexes because we are all suffering from one thing or the other, despite our gender. The only difference is that women are more self-conscious about their bodies than men.
May their experiences inspire and motivate you!!
FIVE MEN TELL US ABOUT BODY INSECURITIES.

Evidence Mutumbu – Zimbabwe (33)
When I was seeking a girl to marry, I developed body insecurities as a result of comparisons with prospective girlfriends.
When a particular lady chose a masculine guy over me, I became less secure in my appearance and began overeating to increase my weight. But my body did not respond well to excessive eating. Another problem was that people were commenting on how little my legs were. In the end, wearing shorts in public made me uncomfortable.
The insecurities vanished when I met a woman who turned down a man and chose me instead. That is when I realized it did not matter. When overeating failed, I concentrated on becoming more comfortable with my body size.
Evidence Mutumbu

Kato Samuel Casa – Uganda (27)
I was a small-sized boy. I was happy with myself all my life until I started dating. I remember one time, I approached a girl to ask her to be in a relationship with me. But the way she replied to me turned my whole life upside down. In her opinion, short boys are not worth men. I loved this girl wholeheartedly, and I stalked her for some years and realized she was a perfect match for me, but she did not want to be with me due to my small size. Secondly, I remember I was in a lecture room on the campus in a medical class. The lecture explained the symptoms and signs of HIV/AIDs, and he used me as an example against my wish. Ohh, I was so disappointed and lost my self-esteem from then on.
My social life came to zero degrees for a very long time. I even stopped associating with other students, feared girls, dressed in hefty clothes, and tried to eat fatty foods so that I could gain the weight that anyone admired. Thank you for bringing it up.
Samuel Casa
Even today, at my workplace, my senior supervisor still addresses me as a “small doctor,” which surely disturbs me a lot.
Samuel Casa

Kinene ‘Shadray’ Marvin – Uganda (31)
I was a small kid, and as I grew up and wanted to be a dancer, I wanted to bulk up because the dancers I admired back then were all medium-sized: Usher, Chris Brown, and most of the guys in movies like You Got Served, Stomp The Yard, and Step Up. It served as a means of intimidating opponents while also making it difficult to be picked on in fights. I also liked how medium-weight looks good in clothes. Stepping out with clothes that fit perfectly in the right places gives you that appealing charm. You drive the ladies insane.
Kinene Shadray

Daniel – 30
“Rock icons have influenced my perception of the ‘perfect’ male figure. As a child, patriarchal media taught me that being muscular was the most desirable trait. On the other hand, Bowie, Lennon (see Two Virgins album cover), Dylan, Lou Reed, and others, on the other hand, made being emaciated, hairless, and toneless sexy. They were my first glimpses of bodies that did not conform to the patriarchal ideal, and they inspired me to believe that I, too, could achieve the same attractiveness without the same genetics or fitness commitment as more typical male sex symbols.”
Byrdie
Sean – New York 34
“My physique has always been a constant in my life—a source of self-assurance that I’ve never had to maintain.” I’m fortunate in that my genetics allow me to eat whatever I want and still maintain a healthy physique. Having a “good body” is intertwined with my personality and influences how I approach dating and sex.
“However, I’ve recently noticed some extra weight around my stomach—I assume too many late-night milkshakes. It’s made me worry if other people see me in the same way they used to, and it’s influenced how freely I remove my shirt and even how I dress. This sensation of body self-consciousness is new to me, and I find myself discussing it with my close friends more than I expected. I am experiencing a tremendous and, to be honest, rather startling concern about how I appear to others. I do not feel constrained by traditional masculinity tropes per such, but I do feel obligated to uphold the reputation I’ve established. It’s more about my ego than anything else. Perhaps it Is the same thing. “I am not certain.”
Byrdie
Insecurities are common among all genders. It’s okay for men to have insecurities too. Men should not allow society to dictate how they should view themselves. They are enough just as they are. If you are without muscles, biceps, etcetera, it doesn’t mean you are not a man enough.
Take excellent care of yourself and love your body.
Accept yourself just as you are, for you are enough.
What other insecurities do men have? Let me know in the comment section and encourage others.
From my heart to yours
Cheers!!!
- Happy Women’s Day
- The Madishas – Varsity Connects
- The Kamberes – Love at first sight
- Beauty has no limits
- Love Kinks
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About The Author
Lebogang Shazzygal
Blogger | Magazine Editor | Creative Writer | Online publisher | Digital content creator | Speaker. A young vibrant lady who's passionate about women's well-being and empowerment, youth, and physically challenged people.
My heart goes to all these men. Honestly though.. I didn’t think men’s body insecurities went this deep. Now I guess, lesson learnt!
And I’m so sorry for Casa about that lecturer, that was so cruel 😢
Thank you for the post, Lebogang.
Ohhh i know my friend. It’s surreal to know that men too experience body insecurities. The stories left me encouraged to be sensitive of what I say towards men. It can be daunting. The fact that they are not vocal about it, doesn’t mean they do not get hurt when we bully and say all sorts of things to them. Thank you for always passing by my friend. Much appreciated
Hahaha i thought I was the only one.
Men we don’t show our insecurities we veil it in our ego.😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂you beat me to it. Was just about to send the link to check it out.
Thank you so much.
Hahhaha Sonyoi thought you were the only one. I actually thought it was only women with body insecurities. And thank you for telling your own experiences.
You did a great with the post.
It’s very helpful
Thanks mate. You aided me to it. A appreciate it
Wonderful .
We are family !
Never knew this about you… Glad you came back to yourself and realised the good lesson in time. This is a thoughtful post. Thank you Lebogang for sharing it. 🙂
Yes these things are real I am writing a book about worse things I went through that I am now free from.
Good for you!! And the readers as well!! Will you let us know once published?? 🙂
I am looking forward to reading the book mate. You are a force to be reckoned with. I’m sure it will also liberate others as you also got liberated. Thank you so much.
Oh thanks allot guys🥂 all along I knew that ladies we are the one facing such much than men anyway as a lesson i think we should have a limit when it comes to talking about someone’s bodyhood like ,etc 🤷 thanks allot guys am always proud of your platforms😍
Absolutely true
I think that’s the most disrespectful and demeaning thing one can say to anyone. It was such a lovely lesson for us to have guys speak about their insecurities. Thank you for your kind words. Much appreciated
Wow! I had never seen it like this. Thank you so much for sharing
I know right. We’ve all always thought it’s us, women, with insecurities. The only difference is that men are not as vocal as women. Thank you for passing by
Wow, what an eye opener. And here i was, thinking arg what body insecurities could men probably have?😂🤔
This is a great piece and a good collection of feedback from men about their thoughts on an important subject. As women and our wider society, we often forget that men have feelings and what is sometimes encouraged is a toxic form of masculinity, which denies emotions and tries to put on an aggressive nature which is wrongly seen as being masculine. Thanks for getting the feedback and sharing. 🙏🏾
Thank you so much Anneta
I so agree with your thoughts. I think as women, we can sometimes be mean and disrespectful with our words towards males. This was indeed an eye opener to correct ourselves and know that as much as we feel offended when people bully us about the way we look, men too experience the same thing. Thank you so much
Amen 🙏🏾. Indeed
We are only surviving because of grace…
But thanks for creating this platform for us
I certainly agree. The grace of God is indeed sufficient and I believe that no matter the life hurdles we face every day in our lives, we are still able to conquer and overcome them. Thank you for your effort to share your stories. You have no idea how liberating it is for many males out there. I’m sure most of them thought they were the only ones with insecurities hence they suppressed what they were feeling or experiencing.
Such a beautiful and important post…most times we focus on women and their body image issues…but it could happen for men too…thanks for starting a discussion on that 👍👍💟💟
Thank you for passing by
I agree with you. We usually think that it’s only women, but conversations like this prove to us that it can be anyone who can experience body insecurities, the best thing to do is to accept yourself the way you are and be the best version of yourself.
Absolutely right..easier said than done but definitely worth striving for 💕💕
I thought most women were smarter than that. My 2nd husband was so good to me. I would not have cared if he had 3 heads. He made me feel beautiful and special. And he made me laugh. His heart was just right for me. The Lord looks on the heart and so should we. You sure have guts Shazzy for such a post!!!😅
I’m so glad you experienced love from your second husband mommy. Not a lot of people are able to experience that. You truly loved him, you would not have cared if he had three heads🤣🤣
When the heart is right, it’s very easy to submit to such a person. It works best
I truly was nervous when I approached them. I thought they would not agree to tell their stories and they did. I truly commend them for their honesty and vulnerability.
You are learning how to interview people. And I think you are learning a lot about people.
I know I really knew the value of a good man because of my first marriage which was not good. We are always learning in this life! 😌
I certainly agree with you
We are always learning in this life. And thank you for for always cheering on. I really appreciate it and I know im not the only one. You are a blessing and a gift to us
You are too sweet! Love you much!🙏🤗🤗🤗
Excellent idea and execution! I enjoyed reading this post, you have shed much needed light on an often overlooked topic.
Absolutely true
We do overlook the fact that insecurities affect everyone including males. Thank you for reading through their experiences.
This is such a necessary conversation!
Loving your body can be a journey… for everyone.
It’s indeed a necessary conversation. Body insecurities do affects everyone including males. Hope you had a great Easter. Love you Nani❤
Great post, I like that this body issue is being talked about more and that we can empathize with one another regardless of gender. Recently read a piece about male actors who felt immense pressure to keep up the 6 pack muscle toned type of body and how it affected their mental health, it was very eye opening as well
Certainly regardless of gender. I’m also grateful that we are able to see that it affects all kind of gender. Usually male folks are not too vocal about their insecurities. This is really an eye-opener to treat everyone the same.
Ohh woww I can’t what the actors had to endure in order to maintain a certain physical stature. Their mental health must have been affected indeed
It’s so great you’re sharing this because men feel pressured to look a certain way too and can be quite insecure as well. It’s also harder for them to talk about these things since they are stereotypically supposed to be more confident.